fully SICK.

michael jackson is dead!

actually that piece of news doesnt hold much significance in the plethora of my personal interests. however, i hope it does serve to assure i havent migrated to a far away rock in self-seclusion. or to a seaside cave, to grasp a literary feel of the full atmosphere for the upcoming harry potter 6. im still breathing and in touch with human society! i merely lead a rather (excruciatingly) banal life (my person also lacking the captivating skills of a raconteur), hence have exhausted all remotely enamoring life tales in my previous four posts (and yet these four poor attempts at a blog, are still more successful than my attempts to pass maths. oh my ailing academic life. maybe its got swine flu).

absence may also be on account that i am an extremely (no matter how many extremelys i type, it wont come close to reality) lazy being (though my humane nature may be called into question if anyone saw the state of my current tomato appearance).

which leads me to apologise if i have misled you into thinking this post will be fully sick Lebanese style. in reality, im merely diseased, detrimentally infectious and should go nowhere near other breathing organisms. yeah. wayy cooler state of 'sick'.

and now even more sick of writing about my mephitic physical state (lets not get into the mental illnesses here). so i shall digress to tell a tale of a person holding a much higher entertainment value.

a long time ago (to be precise, dating back to the release of the twilight movie; and now everyones familiar with the period of time im referring to, yet you would all be scratching your heads if i referred to australia...the film), i lent my neighbour my copy of the twilight soundtrack, because despite all my outer distain and rebuke over anything relating (even as distant as third cousin, thrice removed) to the twilight franchise, i admit the soundtrack was, ok.

fine i liked it so much, i practically begged this neighbour to take 45 minutes out of her housemd-bones-90210-scheduled life (surfing youtube and facebook. im now vaguely questioning why i still associate with her). at the time, she was one of the remaining, rare species of female-homo-sapien not to have been seduced by the pale, frigid cold (hence, naturally, sexable and droolworthy to us) EdwardCullen/RobertPattinson, and refused to acknowledge, barely glancing, at the compact object forced into her hands.

alas, this cadaverous disease (this post is so disease themed it can rival hamlet) soon spread, and my neighbourino boarded the mighty (inscrutable) populous bandwagon of i-loveeeeee-twilight/edward cullen.

now, few months down the track. and my twilight soundtrack is forever lost. to another sufferer of the twilight-loving affliction.

of course, out of respect and consideration for my darling friends privacy rights, she shall remain nameless. i love you helen smellin's ;) now get off your skinny ass and come kiss me better :( because, lets face it, if youre reading this, you have nothing better to do anyway. and i'll play lullaby for you (its the fever talking, but you sometimes get it right with your attempted pursue for good music taste. love you)

xo a now slightly feverish (and oh so much more tomato-faced) shirls


AND - for the love of your good health, stay away from black current flavoured difflam lozenges! dont let their seemingly harmless, alluring purple appearance fool you. their claims of cough (and other sickly symptoms) relief lies. lies.

smelly swirly

last night upon my walk home, dark and dreary, i stumbled across a divinity. no she didnt have legs going up to there, her eyes didnt see through to the windows of my heart and soul, nor did her smile outshine juliet's scorching presence;

she had a scent of baked creamy mashed potatoes.

eyes closed, this ambrosial fragrance carried up through my olefactory nerves and suffused my mind. high on cloud nine (hundred million and one), i was fatuous until i reached my door. envious; damn i wish i smelled that good.


if you were given the chance to be smelling all delectable, what would it be? myself, i'd favour apple pie ;)

o silent pockets

so recently ive found myself in a rather unpleasant position.

unemployment (shame to all you imagining me in ridiculous arrangements).

consequently, i now have very limited (none, if we go into specifics) financial funding with which to amuse myself. hence, in attempt to stem my rapidly declining bank balance, ive sketched out a few rough guidelines which i shall (attempt to) faithfully abide by:

- thou shalt not splurge on unnecessary grocery items, ie. 10 packets of doritos, green bean soy milk, green tea ice cream, rice bubble LCM bars (value packs are not valuable!), 4 for $8 green tea (you have tea leaves!), family packed anythings (you, as a singly entity, are not a family).

- when passing a sale sign, thou shalt walk on by, not walk in & buy
*caution: window shopping may lead to unfaithfulness to these holy guidelines due to insufficient supplies of self control.

- in endeavour to squander away time, thou shalt resort to mindless daydreaming or other invaluable (cost free) activities instead of relapsing into nasty habits such as buying newspapers under delusion of cleverly acquainting self on current affairs, then skipping to the comics/puzzles page.

- thou shalt drag thy lazy behind to a library (perhaps one where you dont owe a large ass fine) instead of buying a book you will never read again since you already know 'whodunit'.

- thou shalt (find, then) read the VCR manual and master the sacred art of video taping, instead of buying, the tasteless movies and series you saw the night before (and cant get enough of) on tv.
* exceptions may include house, how i met your mother, scrubs, i am sam.

and thus hopefully, by embracing and practicing all skills that are ninja (cheap stingy asian), i'll be able to curb my path to destitution.

fellows in the same poor boat are welcome to join me on my quest to freedom (from creditors). =]

xo shirley